Well, that was how Limp Bizkit's My Generation was for me.
From the moment I got my hands on a casette of Chocolate Starfish and the Hot Dog Flavored Water (and after wondering why they spelled "flavoured" like that*) until the moment the tape ended, I was mezmerized. It wasn't just that this was an even more expletive-ridden fuck-fest not even Eminem could manage in my eyes; it was the whole thing. The attitude, the rockin' instruments, Sam Rivers' talents with the bass, John Otto's beats, Wes Borland's riffing, or just the overbearing, magnificent presence of Fred Durst (DJ Lethal gets the "honorable mention") it was one of my favourite things in the whole world.
Fred Durst in particular, with his larger-than-life presence and trademark cap, became a style icon of sorts for me. In Turkey, it was very uncommon then to do what I was doing, but I did it - I had a Toronto Blue Jays cap*, fleece hoodies were in style, and I had no shortage of sneakers. I also had this pair of Marks & Spencer cargo pants that had zippers right under the knee, where you could detach the lower pant leg completely and make shorts of 'em. It was all the rage at school, where we had Wednesdays as casual days*. Before long, I was taking cues from Limp Bizkit videos on how to combine clothing items.
Of course, the album was nothing to sneeze at, too. From the unabashedly vulgar Hot Dog (which I didn't even know had a Trent Reznor diss in its chorus, something I learned after the fact) to the pumpin' Livin' It Up and Rollin' (Air Raid Vehicle) to the delectable 'fuck you' track Full Nelson... in fact, that song was what taught me the phrase, "your mouth's writing checks that your ass can't cash," that I had to ask one of our English teachers, who was American. But it doesn't end there - there isn't one among you whom had watched the Mission: Impossible TV series, fallen in love with the theme tune who wouldn't enjoy Take a Look Around. And for someone who liked rap, or just a fine specimen of rap, Rollin' (Urban Assault Vehicle) was a treat, too.
I never cared much for My Way or Hold On, just to clarify. The former seemed a bit of a bore, and the latter... well, let's just say, the latter was just... no.
But among all the great tracks, Boiler always stood out, as it does. It wasn't the darkness that I loved in Boiler, it was rather that it seemed to be about either a break-up (which I hadn't experienced yet) or just a big "fuck you" to a particularly despicable person... but the smashed instruments, the delivery, the bleak, almost downfilled aspect of it always hit close to home. Because I didn't know thing one about relationships at the time, my perception was guided by tracks like this. Interesting enough, I would discover just how destructive love actually is.
But Chocolate Starfish and the Hot Dog Flavored Water did more than just guide my fashion sense, insofar as I had one, or to give me a sense of what this member of the 2000 brigade would end up leading to. First thing it did was to make me chase music videos. Just the music wasn't enough, I had to see it visualized, no matter how ridiculous it might've been. Also, I learned the dances, the moves, I learned to lose myself in the rhythm, the rumbling bass, the feeling that, yeah, fuck you all! Performance-wise, Fred Durst was always a favourite, because while he was made fun of for trying to do the Michael Jackson backstage, he got some moves.
Second, it taught me to manage my money. By extension, the 2000 brigade was all written down on an ever-expanding spare notepad page (my first album list), given to my dear mother who, while I was in school, would often head out. She was instructed to buy any item on the list that I could afford. I had asked her to not go easy on me - if I didn't have the dough, I wouldn't be gettin' nothin', and that was that.
Third, I went from the object of ridicule and bullying to the wannabe kid whom could be use to embarass teachers and entertain classmates by making him perform solo renditions of Limp Bizkit songs, often the full crotch-grabbing, jump-the-fuck-up dances. Part of me goes red-faced when I recall this, but another part of me remembers having fun, and loving the attention. Because even though the eyes on me were on me for different reasons, at least they weren't on me with condscension or abject superiority. Of course, it got old, but I enjoyed it at the time - deathly scared of it, but digging it, something I would later term the "introextrovert's dilemma." I'm sure I'll get to that eventually.
The 2000 brigade's other members have different, but similar stories, but before that, there has to be a tangent about formats and the lengths I went to just to get a copy of a particular album... Three Dollar Bill, Y'all$.
*Footnotes: 1- My English teachers were disputing whether to use the American or British spelling of words when teaching us, but my favourite one was adamant that the British spelling should be considered the original / the default. As such, I didn't learn to spell words without the 'u's until I got to the university level, and was chided rather harshly for using a hybrid of American and British spellings.
2- That cap was never worn prior to Limp Bizkit. My uncle on my mother's side is a naturalized Canadian citizen, and the cap had been a gift from him.
3- In Turkey, at least when I was a schoolboy, the drill was that Wednesdays were casual clothing days, but the rest of the week, everyone had to wear school uniforms.
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